Pride reciprocated one generation to another

As I entered different moments throughout my life, I remember always being driven to make my parents proud of the man I had become. Although not an all-encompassing theme in life, my desire was to never let them down. As I sat in the brightly lit classroom while I attended the basic law enforcement academy many years ago, I remember this concept, which I held deep inside, being the main topic of discussion. The instructor, a career cop, impressive in stature, eloquent in speech and yet very down to earth and able to solicit cooperation from every student, shared with us the keys to success in law enforcement.

As he spoke, he shared with each of us that everything we do on a daily basis, as peace officers, should adhere to one primary concept. That concept, as he described, was to do nothing that would end up disappointing our mother. I chuckled at the thought. Sure, I wanted to make my mother proud but how realistic was it to think about not disappointing her with every decision, choice, and action I made? As I grew older, I came to realize that life itself was nothing more than a racecourse directed by the desire to always make someone proud.

As I accomplished the feat of envisioning, conceptualizing, and writing my first book this past year, I experienced a moment which will live with me always and truly cements the concepts my old academy instructor strove to pound home with us. While unboxing the initial copies of my book, “The Calling: Seated at the Table With the Broken,” I will admit, I bore an excessive amount of pride in what I had accomplished. All the hard work, long hours, and dedication had finally paid off. Although doing my best to maintain some semblance of humility, my feelings of accomplishment reigned supreme. It was then that a special moment transpired.

Following unboxing my literary officering and finally holding my work in my hands, my daughter, sharing my excitement, looked up at me, moving swiftly in for a hug. Never shying away from the best thing a dad can experience, a hug from his daughter, I stopped what I was doing and held her tightly. As we held each other, my little girl looked up and simply said “Daddy, I am so proud of you.”

The words of my child instilled an entirely different level of pride within me. Sure, I was driven in life to make my parents and elders proud of my actions, but I had given very little thought to the concept of making our children proud of us. Provide for, set them up for success, and teach them, sure, but make them proud? As the days have rapidly passed since my daughters’ words to me, I have thought more and more about the importance of hearing those words and instilling pride within our children.

As it is with us, it is important for our offspring to fully understand how pride can be a beneficial tool throughout life. Teaching them that feeling pride in oneself, their family, friends, and even accomplishments is valid and acceptable. Similarly, it is important for each of us to understand that living our lives with the desire to always make our children proud in effect, sets the foundation for success within the very thing we hold so valued. Strive to live a life where you search for ways to make others proud and in doing so, let us not forget about making our kids proud. For when we do, we teach them the importance of honor, value, and true resilience, preparing them to give back a portion of what they receive.

Richard J. Stephens lives in Carter County and is the father of three little ladies ranging in age from 9 to 29.