It’s a great time for new traditions

“We will have endless talks and share many, many secrets someday,” I whispered in my granddaughter Chloe’s ear, staring at her precious little face, holding her for the very first time.
Wowzy. That was an understatement. I raised two boys. I had no idea how much little girls jibber-jabbered. ALL. THE. TIME.
Would I want it any different? Gosh, no. Our conversations are untouchable. Unmatched. I could write about them and my now 9-year-old granddaughter all day. I absorb things I learn through her curious, innocent eyes like a sponge. One would think I’d never experienced them myself growing up.
So, anyway, speaking of jabber. Back in early summer, we took three of our grandchildren — at the time, ages eight, two and one — and my mom to Cape Girardeau’s Air Show featuring the U.S. Navy Blue Angels.
We had a complete grandparent test that day.
To say the least, we failed. Miserably. But, ultimately, through it, we graduated with much wisdom on grandparenthood. But, that’s a whole other story. So stay tuned for that.
This, however, is about a conversation with Chloe on the way to the air show. Which led to spaghetti. Which led to her special ingredient. And, the fact that the spaghetti dishes — on both sides of her family — taste so exceptionally delicious because of this ingredient she adds to our sauces.
Recipes and their secret ingredients have been concocted in families since the beginning of time. I mean, what’s the staple to most gatherings? Food, of course.
A different dish I grew up on — my grandma, Vi, and her close friend, Kay, started many decades ago — has continued to pass through-out my family, even to my two adult sons. We call it KayVi, named after the two ladies who started it all those years ago. Funny thought, if we were to extend the name to include the many added special ingredients by each generation since its inception, it would sound something like KayViBobRobBridgeSeanJordo.
Nah, we’ll just stick to what we’ve always called it.
But that’s a rice dish and this is about spaghetti.
Since around the age of two, Chloe has added her ‘secret ingredient’ to the spaghetti recipe’s of all of the women in her life — her Nana (my mother), her Momo (maternal grandma), her mom, and I, her Mammi.
After I get my sauce mixed and to a simmer on the stove, I tell her it’s time for her ingredient, then move out of her way and pretend to get busy doing other things. But, actually, I’m watching her out of the corner of my eye as she pulls the ingredient out of her pocket (you can’t really see it, so don’t even try), shakes her empty fingers over the pot, then discreetly slides it back into her pocket.
On the car ride to the air show, in the middle of her chatting about this tradition, suddenly, she paused.
Turned around in the front passenger seat facing her, I could almost see a light bulb glowing over the top of her head.
After a few moments, “Mammi, I guess my secret ingredient really doesn’t make it taste better,” she pondered.
“What do you mean, sweetheart?” I asked.
“Because if I’m really not putting anything in there, then it can’t really be making it taste better.”
Uh-oh. She’s having a true ‘AHA’ moment.
The line in the dirt crossed when children are getting old enough to recognize what’s ‘pretend’ and what’s ‘real’; and it was unfolding right before my eyes.
After a quick glance, then a mutual grin between my mom and I, I felt excited. I mean, isn’t it great to observe your grandchildren growing and discovering in so many different ways? Truly, there is nothing like it. With this excitement, I mentioned wanting to write about it.
Clearly upset, Chloe did not feel the same. She told me I couldn’t because I would ruin it and it wouldn’t be a special secret anymore.
Finally, after a bit of a talk to reassure I wouldn’t really be giving up our secret, I somewhat convinced her that it would be even more special to share because it could possibly inspire others to do the same, and, hopefully, it would keep going. And grow.
So, one day, Chloe will see that what she isn’t putting in the sauce, makes it the best ingredient of all... memories.
There’s no secret to those. Be involved and share with the little ones coming up in your family as much as you can. After all, aren’t those the best ingredients for the recipe of their life’s success?
So, Chloe Gene, don’t you worry, our secrets always will remain safe with me. But mostly, unbelievably special.
Christmas is around the corner. It is a great time to start a family tradition.
My goodness, all of this came about over a simple jabbering session during a car ride.
Let them jabber.
And listen.
Really listen.
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Bridget Curnutt is the Composition Director for the Daily American Republic. She has been employed at the DAR for 24 years. Contact her at bcurnutt@darnews.com